GooglePlus.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

1+1= 69

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +32

the cow goes moo

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Lockerbie bombing

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

GRAAAAAAAR.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops