What long black and tasty? Licorice

thumb_up thumb_down +18

3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +18

69.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call an Amerindian who finished medical school? A doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops