Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Q: What's the difference between a child dressing as a ghost for Halloween and a real ghost? A: About a tablespoon of arsenic.

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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69

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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Roses are red, yup.

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The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

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did you know hellen keller had a dog? niether did she

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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Why do black people like chicken? Because it's tasty, nutritious and easy to cook.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just got AIDS, And soon so will you!

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What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke....? A pig rolling in mud!

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Why did the leaf fall off the tree? Because it was Fall.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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