What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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Q: What happened when lost John lost his crack cocaine? A: He bought some weed.

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels.

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A man and a woman are happily married. The die

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

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Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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who likes to gets to get fisted A) sock puppets

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Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

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why did the jew cross the road? He didnt. He got stuck in the wire fence.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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