Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

thumb_up thumb_down +14

- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

tim tebow and mark sanchez will lead the jets to the superbowl

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Gingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops