what's the difference between rice and an asian? one is a food.

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How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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What do you call a woman in a kitchen ? There rightful place.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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A blonde walked into a bank. She deposited her check, thanked the teller, and promptly left.

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knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

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Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a terrible ship crash that leaves them stranded on a desert island. All of their survival supplies sank with the boat so they don't last very long.

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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The kid wakes up in the middle of the night to get some water. But over hears sounds from his parents room. he looks through the keyhole. Then he comtinues walking and says. "Why does mom say i cant suck things?"

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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roses are red, violets are blue, niggers are black and so is my poo

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If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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