Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: How the heck would I know? I don't Sally.

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Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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69

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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What is Yellow and American? A yellow american

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There once was this guy and he fell down

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An alien just ate your family and all of the things you love

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Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Q: How much jizz does a gay guy have? A: a butt load

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Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

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Why was the math book crying? Three men just brutally raped his wife.

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

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Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

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on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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