A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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If youre African, why are you white?

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops