What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Who the heck do you think you are?! Ally...duh

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between a chair and an identical chair? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a Jew A Jew

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A woman walks into a bar. Since having equal rights, she too falls unconcious..... Several men walk toward the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Guess what? AIDS!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A: A pilot you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

THIS ONE IS MIIINE THIS ONE IS MIIINE I AM TOTALLY TIFA I AM TOTALLY TIFA! This one apparently.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who did that?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops