What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Police Officer: Please step out of the car, sir Jimmy: Xbox...

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

thumb_up thumb_down +33

An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops