What is worse than the holocaust Nothing it was fine with the Jews in camps burning and dying

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A man comes home to find his wife sleeping with another woman. He molests them both.

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Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

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What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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