I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I like Pi. It can make circles.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock. Who's there? I'm sorry I don't know you but I think I might have run over your dog!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Person 1: *sneeze Person 2: bless you Person 1: I'm jewish. They never spoke again.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Need For Speed 30025 DRIVE OVER 60000 EXTREME CARS OVER 60 BILLION REAL LIFE GRAPHICS TRACKS! WHILE LISTENING TO BULLSHIT SONGS THAT MAKE YOU CRY! NO PAUSE BUTTON! EVERY CAR MUST BE UNLOCKED BY PLAYING THE SAME TRACK (Yeah music track too) OVER AND OVER AGAIN! OVER 6000000 ONLINE GAMERS AT THE SAME TIME WORLDWIDE, EACH TRACK HAS 5000000 THOUSAND LAPS SO THE FUN NEVER ENDS! UNLOCK ALL STUFF DLC: 6000 Bucks. Moral: So I have not been here since I called myself the sociopath or something, who the fuck are these Nero`s and Neronism and all that fuck? :( They almost improved my reputation! THATS HORRIBLE!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many black men can you fit into a mini? Five One in the drivers seat. One in the passenger seat. And three in the back seats. Anymore would be both dangerous and impractical due to the small interior volume of the car, and it would also put a significant strain on the cars limited engine power. Especially when tackling a steep incline.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why do black people have white hands? Palms and soles are not in direct sunlight, and therefore less amounts of melanin are produced in those regions.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops