Knock Knock. - Whose there? ... ... ... ... Damn kids.

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Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

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Continents are large islands.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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women rights

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Dementia Pickles

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin after being attacked by a man with a mace.

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Q: How do you make a black man nervous? A: Threaten to kill his family.

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How do you dance to the black eyed peas? You don't you listen

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Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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What's black, white and red all over? Half a penguin.

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-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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New Name for Jersey Shore: American Whorer Story

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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