Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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A black man walks into a store and buys something.

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Person 1: Why do Jews have big noses? Person 2: Why? Person 1: No, I was asking you that question. Person 2: ??!!

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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How many Babies can be drowned in a toliet at once? idk the bathtub is much more convienient

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What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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An epileptic man attends a rave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, nor does the chicken because it's a chicken.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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What did the deaf boy get for Christmas? Something like udgtationdaidnmgf

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Why couldn't the elephant ride a bike? Because he had no thumbs...

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

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A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

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What's the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? I'll eat Megan Fox before I fuck her.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

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Hey! You wanna' hear a joke? Black Freedom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops