When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

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Oh yeah? Well you're as gay as this joke!

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What else is new?

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Women's rights

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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Yo mama's so poor, she can no longer handle the down payments on her home and is in great need of financial aid

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A homeless man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says it'll be $4.50. The homeless man doesn't have any money so he leaves.

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Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

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Why was maddison sad Becasue he was born with a fucking gay name

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'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

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Why was the man sleeping. He was tired

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School

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Roses Are Red I Have A Phone Nobody Txts Me Forever Alone

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Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

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Uh, summa lumma dooma lumma you assuming I'm a human What I gotta do to get it through to you I'm superhuman Innovative and I'm made of rubber, so that anything you say is Ricochet in off a me and it'll glue to you And I'm devastating more than ever demonstrating How to give a motherfuckin' audience a feeling like it's levitating Never fading, and I know that haters are forever waiting For the day that they can say I fell off, they'll be celebrating 'Cause I know the way to get 'em motivated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops