What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

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Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

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yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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A priest a rabbi and a minister are all standing at the gates of heaven. Us mortal beings can only conjecture what might've have taken place.

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Why did the dog eat poop?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

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What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

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I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

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4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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what do you call a black man on a bike? a black man on a bike.

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they want to. This is a free country, where people are free to travel as the please, no matter what their sexual orientation may be

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

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What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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