What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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there's two nuns cycling down a cobbled street. one nun says:ooo iv'e never been this way before! the other nun says:i'm not surprised there's roadworks and a diversion!

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

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What does the Jewish man and the Atheist have in common? They both believe in a god. Except the Atheist.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it because it isn't coming.

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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Why couldn't the man speak any English? Because not everyone can.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

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Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

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don't look behind you

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

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Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Jackson gets a new phone he drops it what does he have. (a beating )

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today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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