Why did my son fall off of his bicycle? Because I hit him with a steak.

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whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

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Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

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whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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What do you get when you cross a tho with a mas THOMAS!!!!!

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Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

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Knock, knock. Come in.......

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a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

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knock knock

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

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Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

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A man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is crippling his family.

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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Why was Bill in jail? He stabbed 17 black people because they didn't deserve welfare checks.

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

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why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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