You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

The phantom menace is the best star wars movie

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

what do you call a guy with a huge dick ? hugedickasorus

What is worse

My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

Q: what is man without a beard A:not a man

A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

OGC - tilt your head

A man orders 3,687 bricks. He gets 3,688 bricks delivered to him. He throws the extra brick in the air. Ok, so a man is smoking a cigar by a woman with a small poodle. They are both in a plane. The woman asks the man if he could get rid of the cigar because the smoke is making her dog turn green. The man refuses. In anger, she throws the cigar out of the window. The man gets angry and throws the poodle out the window. What lands in the poodles mouth when it's falling? The brick.

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

Once upon a time.

What do you call a row of houses that are all different size? A poorly thought out construction project that has enraged townspeople.

Q:When a terrorist attack happened what did the woman with the 1 leg say? A: HOP for your lives!!!!

It says so on your cap.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face pa pa poker face!!!

how do you confuse helen keller? you put her in a room full of naked men and tell her that they are really candy canes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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