What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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Your mom is so poor, she contributes to the high unemployment of the country and didn't even have enough money to feed her family so Social Services came in and took them away

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I walked into town today and bumped into a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. It meant nothing to me because I was never read nursery rhymes as a child due to my parents both dying before I was conceived

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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c+t+c?

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why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

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What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

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If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

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Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

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12 22 giraffe hippo 66 otter zebra cat 99 okay, the end

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What is 10 inches long and didnt get sucked on valentines day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe.

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Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

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Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

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Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Boobs In The Third Grade? A. Because She's 21

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Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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