What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

stfu Aodhan u and kevin are doin all the instigsating

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

a boy with asperges asked me a question today he asked me again and again because he has asperges

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know but some black man is starting up his deep-frier on the other side

Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

Why do mexicans eat tacos? Because they're good

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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