why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

thumb_up thumb_down -45

the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

thumb_up thumb_down -47

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

thumb_up thumb_down -47

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -51

How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

thumb_up thumb_down +40

whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops