What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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This is an anti- joke

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

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What's 9+10 Ebola

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What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

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A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

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What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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