what is big and can make things come out? a gun

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

FUS RO DAH!!!

Why didn't the Hispanic die in the bus explosion? Because he was at home playing with his children when it happened.

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

800 people died last year. end of story

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

How do you end a sentence

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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