On Friday the 13th,My cat turned into a dog.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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what duz 69 mean? its a number duhhhhhhh

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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