When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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it was all Tagart

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A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

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Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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