I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

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What's the difference between a book. A tree's leaves hit the trash cans

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yo mamma so fat she should probably look into a clinical weight loss program and exercise daily.

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Anti pick up line: Boy: If I could re arrange the letters I would put U and I together. Girl: Oh really because if I could rearrange the letters I would put F and U together By Adam Chebali

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops