How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops