knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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Roses are Blue, Europe is Yellow. I suck at poems, Refridgerator

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

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Bitch

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Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

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what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

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Why did the man go to the doctors? He was concerned about his health.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

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A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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How come grilled cheese?

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She died in a car crash.

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You see the love of your life. You can't say anything. She walks toward you. You can't move. She sits on you. You can't do anything. She starts crapping on you. You realize your a toilet. -Adam Chebali

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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