Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

Seeing you happy is what makes me happy Nero, it has always been this way.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

i saw amango it splootered

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

yolo your orange looks orange

Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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