how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Q.What do you call a friend with benefits? A. a buck fuddy.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and legs? Simply a pillow

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Your mom is so fat, that last night after reading and edition of Cosmo, she skipped dinner and cried herself to sleep due to her inability to live up to such an unrealistic feminine stereotype.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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what do an elephant and a mouse have in common? nothing

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Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

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What do you call a bunch black people falling off a cliff? A mudslide! What do you call a bunch of white people falling off a cliff? An avalanch!

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

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What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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What do u call a bunch of black dudes burried from their necks down? Afro-turf

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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