Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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YOLO

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

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Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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A man walks to a baseball game what does he see? Many people

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What do u call a bunch of white dudes siting on a bench ......the NBA

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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