How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

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I obviusly meant: Have you ever seen a cow chasing boots? Because the one with the cowboy chasing boots doesn't make sense...

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

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Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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What does Adolf Hitler hate more than Jews? Nothing.

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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