An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

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Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

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What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

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A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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