- Anti Joke

Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

What happens when you run out of butter You ask antonio

A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA GASP! X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." runs

Goats are like toilets, I shit in them

Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

Did you know that Obama wasn't born in the United States? the contiguous United States

What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

hi dave

Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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