Why did the old man fall down the stairs and died? Because he had a stroke and never got life alert!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

thumb_up thumb_down -12

roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

thumb_up thumb_down -12

have you seen Helen Keller's bird house? neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down -12

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So a Priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into the bar... And got drinks. What did you think was going to happen?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the grocery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you get a girl with two jobs to drop on her knees? Through a penny on the knees

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's your blood type? Red.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops