What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

whats 7+4? 74

Whats worse than being rapped by a giant scorpion. Being gangbanged by a couple giant scorpions

Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

- Helen Keller

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

kk

If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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