i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

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My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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Y' can't spell rape without ape.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

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Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

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Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

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Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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