what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

I don't believe in giraffes.

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

A blind man walks into a bar. He backs up, takes two steps to the right, and walks around the bar rubbing his forehead.

I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

What happens when an Asian with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose

Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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