How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

A man walks in to a bar, He sits down and enjoys a pint.

Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Jimmy fell in mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jimmy took a bath with Bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a clown.

anti-joke.ru - russian style

Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

Hello

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

What do you call a snake at a snail convention? A snake at a snail convention.

Whats red and bad for your teeth? Bricks

Was that last joke funny? Well this one isn't.

How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...