What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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What do you give a man who has everything? Syphilis

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boner

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"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

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what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

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German bedtime story: There once was a boy who liked to suck his thumbs. His mother told him to stop, but he wouldn't. So she cut of his thumbs. Now he has none. Goodnight.

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why did the chicken cross the road? does a chicken have to explain everything it does?? do u explain to everyone around you why you're crossing the road every time?! i think not!

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Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

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Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

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What's worse than an actual joke on anti-joke.com? Many things. Considering this is only one website among millions on the internet, and it really has no effect on what happens in the world, it really isn't a big deal in the grand scheme of life.

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Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

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A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

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How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

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A man noticed that the sun was coming in brightly through his window. He was trying to take a nap and didnt appreciate the sunlight. He closed the blinds.

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how many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 283,000,322,249,390

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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josh is a skinny headed keppy mong

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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How did the young boy cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm. Being raped. What's worse than being raped. Being raped twice. What's worse than being raped twice. Biting into your apple and finding a worm then throwing away that apple, retrieving another apple them biting into it and finding another worm then being raped twice. In the same 5 minutes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes now you do too.

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops