What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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An Aisian failed a test

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Why was the little girl sad? Why???? Because an elephant stamped on her, and shat on her.

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie...

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why did the family have dinner? they were hungry and it was 6:00

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person if the Jewish religion and a pizza is a type of food.

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

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what is yellow with red all over tweety in a blender

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Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

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Those last 4 were by: Walter

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops