Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

Blonde: Hey, what does "Idk" mean? Blonde's friend: "I don't know" Blonde: Thank you for telling me, that has been bothering me for quite some time now.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

what do you call your mom? mom

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "So why are you so happy?" The amputee doesn't answer because he has been completely deaf, blind and mute since birth.

Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

your mammas so fat tha-- my mother is dead. oh... sorry.

What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

What did the lawyer say to the lawyer We are both lawyers

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

What happened when the Neo-Nazi ran into a group of black people? He listened to their struggles, heard their stories, accepted their diversity and eventually hung up his hateful ways.

What's the difference between a red ball and a blue ball? There both blue but the red one

what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead black man on the road? One's a dog and one is a man, but more importantly the differences shouldn't be noted in a miserable occasion such as this as both are unfortunate tragedies. Also, one has a big penis.

Why did the white guy die because he had cancer

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

What's 9+10 Ebola

Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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