Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

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I like the color potato.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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G:nock nock B:come in!

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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Your mother lives so loosely that she has several terminal diseases and only has 3 weeks to live.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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69

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robin, get in the car.

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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Who invented apple? God

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A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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King Triton: "As much as it pains me to lose you, Ariel, I want you to be happy with your prince..." Ariel: "So why don't you just turn Eric into a merman?" King Triton: "Good idea."

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what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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