What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

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There was once a family of termites. There was a Papa termite, a Mama termite, and a baby termite, called Motor. One day they reached a big fat log, and they decided they'd bore through. So first went Papa. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Papa! Next came Mama. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Mama! Last came Motor. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out bored Motor!

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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that krista chich from the below joke accepted me as a friend, then she blocked me. haha WOW, she realy is a bitch.

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What's black, then white, then dead all over? Michael Jackson

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three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

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There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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How did my grandparents survive the Holocaust? Well for starters, it helps that they weren't Jewish, they didn't live in Europe, and quite frankly, they probably would have supported Hitler because they were right wing pricks.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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There once was an old lady who lived in shoe. She had so many children, her uterus fell out.

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what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

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Have you ever seen what Stevie Wonder looks like without his sunglasses? Neither have I.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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I can't wait to eat this bagel! Yes you can. Yeah, I guess you're right.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? No I said Lou. Oh hey Lou come on in.

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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A blonde walks into a bar; she orders and enjoys her drink and then leaves with her thirst quenched.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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