Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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it's funny because it's funny

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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A: Whats black and hangs from my tree in my backyard? B: What? A: Blackberries B: Blackberries grow on bushes

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

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what did batman say to robin to tell him to get in the car? get in.

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Q: Where did Sarah go when the bomb exploded? A: Everywhere.

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What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

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Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at his genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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