What's worse than discovering a hornet's nest next to your house? Being raped.

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wouldnt it be ironic if chuck norris was shooting blanks

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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so three men walk into a bar and one is a priest.

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

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If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?

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A man rode into town on friday and left on friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a week

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In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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Why are white people white? Cuz they were Born This Way Why are black people black? Cuz they were Born This Way Why are Mexicans so tan? Cuz they were in the sun too long at birth

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How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver comes into the bar and gulps down the guys drink and the guy starts crying the lorry driver says "dont cry ill buy you another" thee guy sas "it's not that today i woke up late for work and when i got there i got fired and then when i went to go home feeling depressed my car doesnt startand so i walk home and i find my wife in bed with the gardener and so i came here to die but you drank my poison"

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

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A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why did the two blonds go to the bar together? Because they were carpooling to save money and help save the earths ozone layer that seals in all of our oxygen. They were also meeting some friends.

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What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

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Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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