A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

Technically I did not try to, but I made you believe I tried in vain, so your subconcious is unable to register that it is under a state of trance, you could deny it, but you are in a state of trance right now. So how big are your breasts?

What did the cow say to the horse? Mooo

Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

a cat a dog and a penis meet up. The cat said ur lucky, when you have to pee u can go wherever you want. the dog said your lucky you can go in a litter box. the penis said your lucky u dont have to put a ballon over your head and do pushups till you throw up!!!

What do you call a New Zealander with 1000 lovers? A shepard

What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

68

An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

CHAD'S A FAG!!!

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

A spatial closet situates trolls beside the whistle.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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