How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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anti-joke.com

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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If life hands you melons, you might be dyslexic.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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why did the man throw a stone in the lake? because he'd had a long day at work.

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whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

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what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it~? lots of things.

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chuck norris once kicked a man verry hard that man proceded to lose contiosness and chuck norris was disqualified from the martial arts compatition

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Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally Sally who? Haha I'm just kidding, I'm Jorge.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he has no sense of living and no muscles to move.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What's the difference between an egg and a Llama? The'yre both not lamps.

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Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

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What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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