Obama says: I can throw one 1,000 dollar bill out the window and make one person really happy Michelle says: I can throw ten 100 dollar bills out the window and make ten people really happy The Co-Pilot says: I can throw you both out the window and make 250,000,000 people really happy tee-hee

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What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

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What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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Why did the fireman die? For various reasons,one was because he was burnt alive.

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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What happens when you go from a jew to a penguin? A huge climate change.

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whats difference between womens rights now and 10 years ago? nothing, they are both just lies men tell women to make them feel good.

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roses are red carnations are white dont go to bed or ill f**k your friend dwite

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What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

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What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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