What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What did one jew say to the other? Hello.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

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why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

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I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

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Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

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Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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What does Yoko Ono say while rehearsing her song before a concert? She gives directions to the band.

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whats brown and booky a book.

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

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Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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What's brown an sticky Shit

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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