What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

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Why is an elephant gray Because it's GRAY!!! duh

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What did the KKK member say to the african american man. Nothing, he just killed him.

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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Steve jumps through a window...he forgot he was on the 231st floor...He dies

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 had a gun.

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What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

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A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

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What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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Why did the room go dark? Somebody turned the lights off

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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